William Wegman | The Omnipotent Poobah Speaks!

LONDON 2012 CALLING - The Canadians are convinced their women's water polo team can do for that sport what it did for curling. Click photo >>

It’s bad enough we have to hear her, now we have to eat her too…wait, that didn’t come out right.
It’s not Thomas Jefferson, but it does say something about America.
Boy George would’ve done it too, but it scared the bejeebus out of him.
It’s amazing how far a smidgen of talent and a secret dick will take you these days.
Photos from the days when she was only known as simply “Lady Gag“.
Lady Gaga goes all a Titter.
Donny Osmond doesn’t like Lady Gaga. Who saw that coming?

They Blinded Us With Science

It’s a veritable cornucopia of robots!
They aren’t “wussies”. They’re remotely-controlled electro-mechanical submissive engineers.
Scientists tried a new element because their previous Curry Bomb was ineffective.
When Sam kissed his wife, he realized all those Auto-CAD classes hadn’t been a waste after all.
After seeing how much a robot could change her boyfriends, Susan decided to recommend them to all her friends.

The Triumph of the Capitalist Will

You know things are bad when your underwear has to text your ass to tell you it’s wet.
Usually, it’s an America’s Funniest Home Video when a yo-yo and nuts come anywhere near each other.
The baby dolls are a little weird, but the fetuses in plastic bags are a bit too Kansan for my tastes.
Snappy new fashion accessory or useless S&M outfit? You decide.
The world’s first car that can park itself in its own glove compartment.

Huh?

See what William Wegman hath wrought.
Whack-a-Michele - just like Whack-a-Mole, only better.
No porn stars in sheep’s clothing were allowed on McDonald’s farm.
When thinking about potato chips the words “natural and warm” don’t usually come to mind.
Republicans think Obama’s whole walking on water thing is the worst.
Personally, I would’ve ranked Grover Cleveland better than No. 39, but then, I love a moustache.
Sure they like a scrotum tickle now and then. What male doesn’t?
Yes, he likes it. But, it’s tough to sneak up on prey when you’re riding a half-pipe.
“You dee-serve a brick todaaaaay…” (Sung toYou Deserve a Break Today)
Let’s throw anotha ‘roo on tha bahbee, maayt.”
Dudeism: A new religion for a new age. (Konagod)
A skydiver’s parachute doesn’t open and kills him. This is news?
Of course Playboy rejected them. None of them could compare to a nude Marge Simpson in their wildest dreams.

Geeks With a Traveling Show

SEXUAL HIJINKS - Perhaps Larry Craig was telling the truth that he really is heterosexual. Click photo >>

Researchers discover a new syndrome, “quadratit” .
Finally, there’s hope for those who couldn’t find their scrotum with a flashlight.
Obama thought he needed a new plan to bail out underwater mortgages, then the light came on…Octomom and remained on!
Laaaadeeees and gentlemen, let’s give it up for…Jerkin for Money!
Yet another reason the West never really had anything to fear from the Soviet Union.
Some of these people shouldn’t be into cosplay or any other kind of play for that matter.
He felt the power of a thousand men, then discovered he left his pants at home. Needless to say, the whole thing then fell apart.
Colin was really proud of his motorcycle gang, “Hell’s Scooters“.
It turns out Padit was right to be sceptical – Sanal really couldn’t kill him.
Rush Limbaugh’s voice might kill beetles, but snakes in the grass use it to stimulate breeding.
Beatrice had some impressive skills, unfortunately she could find absolutely no use for them.
Fifteen minutes can save you 15% or more gekccos.
Ah one, and ah twowa, and ah…hey! Does anyone have a burrito handy? (Bill “Jersey” Straub)
When you worship Britain’s Prince Phillip, you should question the role of religion in your life…but Camilla Parker-Bowles is an entirely different matter.

Crimes of Witless Passion

Dangly bits among the flowers is too much for his neighbors to take.
This is Texas. This is a naked “Texass” on a billboard.
The Tea Party movement tried to branch out to Australia, but ran into unexpected difficulties.
Of all the weird things to happen in a NYC cab, this is probably far from the weirdest.
Clearly, it was a case of Grand Theft Gilligan.
See, gay marriage is just like straight marriage.
Who knows what danger lurks on the toilets of the world’s Port-o-Potties?
Jorge’s T-shirt predicted the future, “I robbed a Taco Bell and all I got was this stupid empanada.”
Krystal was grossly misunderstood. She was only offering the baby as collateral for the overdue balance.
Patrick was wrong to dispense gherkins in such an irresponsible manner, but damn…it got results!
Everyone HATES the media!

It’s Not Just the Japanese Language That’s the Barrier

Now that must have been some good shit, dude.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t the whole age thing work the other way around?
A combination of robots and Japanese culture. Does it get any better than that?