The Convictions of the Convinced: Don’t Count the Republicans Out Yet

Republicans are crazy

The convictions of the convinced are dangerous. Democratic conventional wisdom is that Republican alienation of almost every voter block in the nation, including many of their own, makes for a Dem sweep in the next cycle. Don’t count your votes before they’re cast, especially when Republicans are jacking voting laws at will.

The Republicans aren’t just in a civil war, they’re nuking, chemically attacking, and hand-to-hand combatting each other. The rest of the country is collateral damage. The only thing they all agree on is “this crazy shit’s gotta stop” as they do the craziest shit imaginable.

Tea Partiers have the mistaken impression the country is no longer “center right”, but somewhere to the right of Genghis Khan. They pull right like a Model T with a missing wheel. Meanwhile, the rest of the country pulls left like a car needing an alignment job. The country is becoming center/center as a response to the extremism of the Grand Old (Tea) Partiers and it’s an ever-quicker shift. The result: the Teas think everyone else is a communist while everyone else thinks they are bat-shit crazy.

I have two guiding principles. Never try to speak rationally to the irrational and never underestimate the power of lunatics in large groups. Therein lies the danger in Democrats believing that showing up to watch the Republicans go all NRA on themselves and do a Columbine is enough.

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Pegleg Romney Decries Loss of Pirate Jobs, Blames Obama

The Hamptons (OPN) – The International Maritime Bureau announced on Monday that pirate attacks have decreased 54% over the past 6 months. The Bureau received reports of 177 attacks vs. 266 attacks in the previous reporting period. The unexpectedly low numbers have attracted the attention of embattled Presidential candidate Mitt Romney who blames President Barack Obama for the falling pirate jobs numbers.

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Gee Willikers! Who Knew the Super Committee Would Deadlock?

Little Green Committee MenGee willikers, it seems Congress’s deficit “super committee” is having trouble reaching their goal of reducing the deficit $1.5 trillion by their Nov. 23 deadline. Who could’ve guessed a committee of 6 Democans and 6 Republicrats wouldn’t rise above the obstruction in Congress’s bowels to avoid a prolapse in the nation’s economic ass.

The answer: the same dolts who didn’t see the economic implosion coming.

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