Mitt Romney is an Enigma…to Himself

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Not Understanding Yourself is Depressing

George Bush and Mitt Romney share myriad similarities. Each has two-scoops of hubris in their bowls of Raisin Bran. Both have an uncanny ability to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Mitt spends as much time with his wingtips in his mouth as George spent with his West Texas shit-kickers in his. For both, a gaffe isn’t so much a mistake as it is a rounded hook used to pull their dumb asses off the world stage. The list goes on. It is very long.

One of the defining characteristics of Bush the Lesser was that, as politicians go, he wasn’t much of a flip flopper. Once he took a position he stuck with it come hell or high water. He didn’t change no matter how bad the position. He merely added rancid meat to its bones in an attempt to co-opt the gullible into believing it was the best damn decision ever. Too many people fell for it, much to their eventual chagrin.

Mittens Never Met a Position He Wouldn’t Change

On the other hand, Mittens never met a position he wouldn’t change. John McTheusela was a lot like that and wasn’t very successful with it. It plays very well into the general bipartisan feeling that politicians never tell the truth and would throw their mothers under the bus if it would buy a swing state or hefty corporate donation.

Obama heartily tucks into the Grand Slam pancake special from Denny’s too, it’s just that he has the good sense and talent to be eloquent about it. When he flips, he rarely flops. That’s apparently not a skill you learn cutting the hair of gay kids at prep school.

The question is, “Does Mitt actually believe the things he espouses?” The answer, at least at the time he says them, is yes.

When he says Obamacare is evil, he means it. He doesn’t know shit from shinola about not having a safety net. When he calls the British Olympic-level dumbasses, he means it…and he’s quite offended when they point out otherwise. He doesn’t understand the nuances of foreign policy and wades into the turgid Middle Eastern waters bloviating as though he’s addressing a fundraiser. Wait, he did bloviate to a fundraiser full of people who can’t vote in America.

That Rich Mahogany Wood Feels So Good

Bush and Romney Share So MuchLike Shrub, he won’t remember a single thing he did wrong. Such is the way of CEO presidential candidates. They have no clue why they want to be powerful, aside from it giving them wood and that rich mahogany feels so good. Their idea of policy making is to delegate responsibility and tell the poor bastard who does the work to report next week on a complete reorganization of the government usually comprised of nothing more than moving boxes around on an org chart. The prime skill of his Chief of Staff is wizardry with Visio.

Mitt’s apparent and constant equivocation exposes him to charges of being too wimpy to live at 1600 Pennsylvania. Nothing could be further from the truth. Oh, he believes he’s consistent and strong. He believes with the fervor of anyone whose sole experience with the non-moneyed is the gardener.

He’s just a sensitive soul. He watched Mommy and Daddy get their political asses handed to them several times and was incensed on their behalf. They were made of tougher stuff and brushed it off with a bit more aplomb.

This Guy Is an Enigma To Himself

He hated them being hurt and was puzzled why. The lesson he took away wasn’t to cowboy up and understand the ways of politics. Instead, he gets incensed when people attack him. He’s just as clueless today as to why Mommy and Daddy were spanked back in the day. He just doesn’t get it and has a fight or flight response heavily biased to riding his bicycle off to France wearing a black tie and white shirt. A summer in Provence is more his speed than people saying he’s a nimrod. Still, he’s not a wimp, he stands up to it…even if he doesn’t understand it.

When people say he doesn’t get it, they’re only half-right. He understands, after a fashion, that poor and middle class people suffer. He’s seen enough Bain & Co. pie charts to get that. What he doesn’t understand is himself. He’s mystified why his gaffes are gaffes, even if he does walk them back on his campaign advisers’ orders. He’s mystified why people don’t like him – after all, he never had that experience at the club. He’s mystified that people don’t think that what is good for him, as General Motors found out, isn’t necessarily good for the country. A mystified President is a bad President, regardless if they are from Texas or one of the 50 states where he owns a home.

And boy howdy, this guy is an enigma to himself.

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