The Class War Paradigm

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Greedy Bastards

One of the few things that garners any bipartisan support these days is that America is embroiled in a Class War. The wealthy are doing OK by their own admission. They just want to be more OKer than they are and are willing to hire lobbyists, fund gigantic super-pacs, shut factories, or buy politicians to do it. Their chant is, “Taxes? Taxes? We don’t need no stinking taxes…you do…and more of ’em too!”

The Middle Class is disappearing like a spotted owl in a forest fire and their complaint is that they are not doing so OK and expect things to get less OK in roughly the same proportion as the wealthy become wealthier. By and large, they can’t afford the lobbyists, gigantic contributions to gigantic super pacs, or the price-per-pound for incompetent politicians. Besides, the wealthy’s run on the Safeway pretty much depleted the stock of everything at any price.

The poor on the other hand can’t now nor could ever afford the political niceties money can buy. Having no place to live and no food to eat tends to make people very busy with more important things than whether Obama should apologize to a rabid band of Afghans. If the wealthy are the US Seventh Fleet – run by mercenaries, because wars are so damned unpleasant –  and the Middle Class is a reasonably well-armed Third World conscript army that has no choice but go and get their asses shot off, then the poor are outside the wire and just getting reconditioned rocks and sticks to shore up their societal position.

The poor are on everyone’s shit list. Many want to tax them more so “everyone pays their fair share,” but there are two things wrong with that – A: Taxing nothing, even at 100%, leaves…well…nothing. B: If we’re so worried about fair shares, why are the wealthy under-taxed and the middle over-taxed?

But the biggest problem with trickle down economics in the middle of the world’s driest desert during a drought is that almost nothing trickles. By the time the wealthy syphon off most of the cash and the middle class squeezes the rock a bit more, the only thing trickling down to the poor is a steady stream of dust on which to choke.

Maybe it’s time for a change in approach. The only other thing America agrees on is that our current system is well and truly screwed. Perhaps we should begin looking at things past the whole wealth vs. tax thing. Wealthy and middle classes must be more altruistic about what they want and can get. So let’s get all entrepreneurial on the problem and do it the free market way just like the wealthy are always preaching.

For example, if there is anything your typical wealthy person driving a Romneymobile hates, it’s dirty, unkempt people pissing in the doorway of their favorite restaurant. Your average middle class burgher feels the same. Trying to extract more money from people who have none is a pretty stupid way to lift those people out of poverty.

Instead, let’s admit none of us really likes homeless people camped out in the median of the local freeway and we’re willing to pay somewhat more in order to get the product we want – people living in houses, not pissing in doorways, or causing traffic hazards by squeegeeing windshields at rush hour. The amount we would pay would float with the supply of indigents in a true free market fashion.

Hey, it could work.

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One thought on “The Class War Paradigm

  1. The growing awareness about the extreme income inequality and the very wealthy’s grip on our political system indicate that some form of class war is all but inevitable. I am developing a set of ground rules for a possible class war that would guide it in a peaceful and productive direction. The Rules for the Class War begin at this post: I am open to hearing everyone’s comments and suggestions.

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