Palin’s Monday Morning Leak Plugging

Sarah Sez

THE TWIT TWITTERS - When is a massive security leak the same thing as a pre-publication book leak? When Sarah Palin is involved.

The world’s new infant terrible, WikiLeaks head Julian Assange, is the water cooler topic this week for dropping 250,000 secret State Dept. documents on an unsuspecting populace. There’s no dearth of analysis of the documents. There are numerous pieces citing the most damaging documents and lots of embarrassing sniping like thinking Hamid Karzai is an incompetent pootiehead – a “revelation” that could hardly be called a secret.

Opinions about whether the leak was a good thing or bad thing depend largely on where you stand. Journalists don’t necessarily say Assange was right, they mostly just concentrate on mining the information for interesting bits for reportage. Politicians and diplomats are foursquare against it since the cables are embarrassing and potentially dangerous. As usual, the public is schizophrenic.

Unless you’re a complete pollyana that believes all governments are intrinsically good and that speaking publically and directly between countries is always the right strategy, you miss the point that there are bad guys out there – sometimes even including the US. To deal with the bad guys, a certain amount of secrecy, spying, and circumspect diplomacy is required.

But not all secrets are created equal.

Not All Secrets are Created Equal
The government frequently classifies information more tightly than is probably warranted. After all, classifying secrets is a subjective task. I’m sure the leaks reveal some of these over-protected facts, but that’s not necessarily a reason to release them. Some are things the public has a right to know, others are better kept quiet. In other words, The Big Dick™ keeping his appointment calendars secret surely carries less weight – some would say no weight at all – than a memo revealing nuclear launch codes, but that’s “above our pay grade”.

You Betcha!

You betcha!

Once the leaks are in the open, journalists are faced with their own dilemma – report on them thereby expanding their dissemination or keep mum even though the information represents a horse that has already escaped the barn. There are points to both positions.

The public is of both minds, although both minds probably read the leaks with interest and sometimes amusement – even the folks who are against the release. They’re like people who go to NASCAR races and swear they aren’t there to see the crashes.

Then in our present rancorosity, charges, counter-charges, rumor, and fact congeal into a dirty mess. Sarah Plain leads this camp. Big surprise here, she thinks Obama is an incompetent boob who let it happen. She trumpets that the administration should be pursuing Assange like Osama Bin Laden. She also thinks Assange is a traitor, apparently unaware that he is Australian so if there is any treason, it’s between him and the Land Down Under.

In fact, Obama is ultimately responsible because it happened on his watch, but that doesn’t mean his response is any more incompetent than Sarah’s would be in the unlikely event she was in Obama’s shoes.

Spying and leaks are notoriously difficult to detect beforehand. Normally, the culprit either needs to be the incompetent one or the information has to leave the building before you even know there’s a problem. To one degree or another, this has happened to every administration. The Obaminites already have Army Specialist Bradley Manning in custody and is conducting additional investigations to catch any new culprits and tighten security.

Hunting down Assange like the second coming of the Cave Dweller might sound all mavericky, but it isn’t necessary. Sweden has a detention order out for him and his lawyer has regular contact with him. Finding him using the investigative power of the entire western world shouldn’t be that hard. Heck, we could even send The Big Dick™ or his sock puppet George out to waterboard the lawyer to find Assasnge.

Legal Remidies are Never Quick
The administration isn’t letting the legal issue go away. AG Eric Holder is conducting an “active, ongoing criminal investigation” into the leak. However, it’s not clear exactly what the US can do legally to apprehend and prosecute an Australian who may be in Sweden and is already in legal hot water there not to mention the other countries looking for his crapulent hide. Legal remedies are never quick, especially with multiple countries involved.

As for freezing funds, the US can’t freeze funds elsewhere or as is likely in this case protected or hidden, without the legal help of those countries. Besides, I’m not sure anyone knows how much WikiLeaks or Assange has.

Does the Obama adminsitration deserve criticism for what has happened? Yes, it happened on their watch, just like 9/11 happened to the last administration’s. Do things need to be changed? Yes, there always are when something happens and you find holes in what you’re doing. Has the administration been slow on the uptake? Yes, but probably not any more so than similar problems happening in earlier administrations.

Assange says his next docudump is on a large US bank (rumored to be Bank of America).  Once this one comes around will Obama again be at fault or accused of some nefarious plan to intentionally cause the leaks as some have charged this time? I suspect so, but we’ll see. Miracles do happen, but there are some who believe Obama is some sort of Machiavellian schemer who “hates America”, which would seem to be at direct odds with the same people who think he’s too incompetent to tie his shoes.

The truth is none of us know what he’s doing or will do or how fast he will do it. At this point, it’s a secret.

You know, that thing he is supposed to be unable to keep.

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Randomness: Behold! The Blue Light in the East!

Old Man and the Sea

HOLY MOSES - Moses turns into Noah, who morphs into the Old Man and the Sea. Total catch: 3 fishes Click photo for more >>

Tis the Season to Shop Mad-ly…

Um, Yeah

Enough with the Anime Already

Leaving Them Scratching Their RoButts

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Parodies and the Public: Is Everyone so Gullible?

The Rare Obama Corn

TRUTH OR FICTION - President Barack Obama wrestled a grizzly bear and a unicorn today in response to rumors that the two animals were socialists.

Update Fox Nation readers confuse Onion article with real news

I’m not really a pundit, I just play one on the web. And on occasion, commensurate with my faux punditly duties, I write a parody post. I may do this as a commitment to one of my core principles, “Scorn is mightier than ignorance”, or I might be bored or ready for a rant or just because I want to have a little fun – a pundit’s work is never done.

However, one of the consistent things about these parodies is that they always draw some proportion of people who actually believe them. One a few months back required me to add a disclaimer for fear open warfare would break out between the people who believed it was real and defended its “truth” and the people who believed it was real and tried to refudiate it.

Refudiate something that wasn’t true. Odd concept that.

Causing an Ideological War of the Worlds
I like to think I can sling a pithy narative as well as the next guy – certainly better than Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh – but, I find it hard to believe that my parodies are so great and realistic I might accidentally cause some sort of an ideological War of the Worlds.

Stupid Voter

STUPID IS AS STUPID DOES - Some people are so committed to the concepts of ignorance and gullibility they're forming their own political party.

I used to be mildly pleased by this. Ha ha, look how I pulled the wool over their eyes! It made me feel superior in the same way watching Jerry Springer makes me feel superior. I may be a goob, but at least I’m not an uber-goob who takes DNA tests to prove which of the 37 trailer park coquettes he’s been banging carries his child (it turns out about 34).

But as I rack up my tally of rubes, I’ve begun to wonder about the wider implications.

Our national discourse has become so rancorous and full of outright lies and gross distortions, you can’t even make things up anymore. People actually believed my  piece on the affair between Suzanne Malveaux and George Bush. Ditto my recent piece covering the Tea Party’s outrage over Obama pardoning Thanksgiving terror turkeys.

This may explain the popularity of  The Daily Show or Stephen Colbert‘s testimony to Congress. We know people watch those shows for their news, but the assumption that viewers understand they’re seeing imaginary news may be too broad.

The REAL Thanksgiving
Even when people watch mainstream news outlets like Fox, their common sense takes a powder. As I write this, Rush Limbaugh is pontificating on how the Indians scammed us on Manhattan and the pilgrims failed because they were socialists, a view supported by an honest to God US Congressman.

There was a day when that would’ve caused most people to shake their heads and think, “DAMN, there are a lot of imbeciles.” These days it draws a yawn, and in a truly troubling number of cases, more people who believe the blatant fantasies.

One of the core principles of the Founding Fathers was that of a well informed electorate. For example, believing horses could talk would at least cause the Founders to question your critical thinking skills. Today, pro-horse talking and anti-horse talking factions would form, there would be rancorous debate, and new laws enacted that both forbade and supported talking horses as a dozen different talking horse lobbies demanded.

We may have become too stupid and gullible to vote, particularly when the people we vote into office think the pilgrims failed because they were socialists. I’m tempted to write a parody about this, but it’s impossible.

There’s not enough believable reality left to craft a decent faux reality.

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