Honest to God August 21
There’s no shortage of debate over Islam. Depending on your point of view, Muslims are either violence-crazed zanies with a taste for camel milk and Molotov cocktails or misunderstood practitioners of a religion of peace, love, and kindness - think Amish with headdresses. But for the most part, there isn’t much talk about the similarities that Muslim fundamentalists share with Christians and Jews.
The problem isn’t the religion, the problem is all religions that mutate into asshatted, intolerant extremism.
For example, all three religions share a fuzzy line between religion and nationalism. Iraqi Muslims battle to create three Iraqs - Kurdistan, Sunnistan, and Shiastan. Other Muslim countries share a similar problem. Each group is so intolerant of the others they’d rather kill each other over centuries-old disagreements and slights than live peaceably with benefit of drinking water and electricity.
Clearly this God thing is a touchy subject best not discussed over dinner - or anywhere else for that matter.
Jews don’t fare much better. They use their religious nationalism to justify hating the Muslims with a passion reserved for public divorce cases with millions of dollars at stake. Many Israelis would just as soon have the Palestinians go away, preferably in a nuclear cloud. That final solution would give them plenty of time to hate someone else, say Christians or Hindus who don’t see them ecumenically eye-to-eye.
And then there are the Christians, that lovely religion of peace and harmony broken into so many fractured, bumptious sects they could teach the Muslims a thing or two about hurling invective at each other. After all, it only took the Catholics and Eastern Orthodox potentates 800 years to agree to even be in the same room, much less heal the divide between them. If you don’t believe that nationalism - and a fair amount of hypocracy - doesn’t live in their brotherly hearts, remember that American religious fundamentalists, mostly uber-conservative protestant adherents, are intolerant to any belief that rubs against their own. If there isn’t a copy of the Ten Commandments nailed to every flat surface, they cry foul and don a self-knitted cloak of persecution - yet another similarity religions share.
The word fundamentalist describes someone who strictly adheres to core principles. Apparently, one of those principles is a belief that anyone who disagrees with you is automatically trying to grind you under the jackboot of oppression - and God gave you free reign to whine about it until everyone comes to blows.
So here’s an idea: how about some religious leaders get on the hot line to the big guy and ask for divine intervention. Surely, that satellite dish-sized miter the Pope wears can pull in a strong signal or Pat Robertson could stop by for a nice chat, up close and personal-like. You clearly need a thunderbolt up the ass to stop doing what you’re are doing to yourselves and the world. . .at least I assume an all knowing, omnipresent dude can handle that order. Religions have become nations unto themselves, squatting on the territories of legitimate nations. If they want to be nations, they better grow up and act like them. That means talking and compromising rather than screaming and poking eyes and teeth out in exchange for other eyes and teeth like Mike Tyson in the ring after a particularly savage bender.
Every religious person isn’t like this any more than every African American eats fried chicken and watermelon or every white person is named Muffy or Brad and wears pressed chinos to the club for a nice afternoon of croquet. It’s time for the religious of all stripes to get off the sidelines and do something about your less well-behaved brethren and sisteren. If you’re going to be a nation, how about you stop allowing your least-qualified members to squat on land like the Pilgrims loosed on the Native Americans. Please, find something - anything - you can agree on, because religion sure ain’t working and the whole affair is one stupendous pain in the arse. For the record, I’m an atheist. I don’t have an ax to grind. If you want a mediator, I’m sure I could do as least as good a job as one of Reverend George’s trade negotiators. I promise a reasonable compromise and I’ll make sure you don’t get taken a little too heavily at the collection plate.
No really. I would. Honest to God.
Tech Tags: religion fundamentalism christian muslim judaism omnipotent+poobah
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daveawayfromhome Aug 21
Yeah, you’ld think a Being that is omniscient, omnipotent, and omneverythingelse could deal with petty stuff like uncovered legs, the mixing of meat and cheese, walking the wrong direction around the shrine, or saying “trespasses” instead “sins”. Why people would even want a God that fits into a tiny little box built out of intolerance is beyond me; I like my deities a bit larger in scale.
Omnipotent Poobah Aug 21
Dave,
Larger like me?
sumo Aug 22
Very good Poobie…thorough in fact. I think you should be the new (sort of like) Dalai Lhama and spread your words like the lily’s of the field. Did I spell that right?
Tengrain Aug 22
Good to have you back, Godling!
Regards,
Tengrain
mojotek Aug 22
To me, it feels like religions are the spiritual world’s equivalent of Oligopolies. Just like the business world’s tendency for firm’s in a market to merge into a select few multi-national conglomerates with all kinds of power over the consumer, the same goes for our preferred religious sects.
We would be better off pursuing our spirituality on our own, just like competition between thousands of firms is good for the consumer, but our human nature has a tendency to want to belong to a group that can tell us what to believe.
Spirituality is a very individual thing, and should be treated as such. I think organized religions are a travesty for people who think there really is some higher power.
Hell, no religion has it right, and none ever will. Organized religions just give us an excuse to be intolerant of others beliefs. If we were all seeking “spiritual enlightenment” on our own, we could actually engage in useful and unbiased debate between one another.
OK, that’s long enough. Time to get off my horse.
Dusty Aug 22
What\’s even worse than this debate is the one where MY God is the Real God and your\’s is just a figment of your little imagination.
Wars have been fought over this shit. How fucktarded is that? You can\’t even see this \’guy\’ and your willing to kill thousands upon thousands over him? Jeebus..get a life!
Deb Aug 22
Back with a vengeance are we? Glad to have you back.
Religion relieves one of the need to think or take responsibility for the hard stuff, you just put it in God’s hands. Whichever one you believe in. Then defend it to the death.
Gets on my last nerve. Is it strange to believe in God and not religion?
Dusty Aug 22
Deb..if I can interject and respond to your question. I am a believer in a higher being..aka GOD. But I have no belief what so evah in organized religion..so yes its possible and probably better for you!
Omnipotent Poobah Aug 22
Sumo,
I thought it was “lammy mommy”.
10G,
I’d say it’s good to be back, but then I had to go back to work, so there you have it.
Mojo,
A sudden vein of seriousness? You’ve been talking to God again, haven’t you?
Dusty,
What would Jeebus do?
Deb,
I gotta go with Mojo and Dusty on this one. I’d say those who can balance God and a religion are few. It’s a very tricky thing to do, but it can be done.
Blue Gal Aug 22
So often I talk or email with fellow lefties who have just had it with the religious right to the point that they can’t stand Christianity or even religion in general. It’s as if there is such a slippery slope in their minds between any admission of faith and total fundamentalism that it’s just not worth it to go down that path. No religion is better than any religion, because in the end we all become Pat Robertson or Al Qaeda.
I’m actually quite sympathetic to those lefties who think they hate Christianity. Funny thing is when you engage these lefties in conversation, a great many of them think Jesus was a cool guy, and some actually revere him. Even those who reject Christianity outright are not nearly so angry as they let on.
Let me point something out here, speaking full-disclosure as a believing Quaker: Jesus of Nazareth was nailed to a tree by the political and religious CONSERVATIVES of his day because they mistakenly thought they had power and that he threatened that power. ANY Christian, myself included, who thinks they would have rescued Jesus from the cross, that certainly WE wouldn’t have gone along with Pilate and Judas and abandoned him like Peter, are just kidding themselves. And those right-wingers who think they’re really serving the cause of Jesus by electing Republicans, or working to make America a “Christian” nation?
Antithetical to the revolution Jesus sought to instill.
Thanks for a great post, m’dear.
Dusty Aug 22
Jeebus would smite BushCo’s ass in a NY minute..
Jeebus was the first peacenik..but the religious right seems to forget that.
Omnipotent Poobah Aug 22
BG,
I agree wholeheartedly. The problem is religion, it’s any religion that allows itself to be hijacked by the asshated. Thankfully, the Quakers seem quite safe with you and Dave in the congregation.
Dusty,
The image of a thunderbolt up Chimpy’s ass IS quite compelling.
Blu man chu Aug 22
Thanks for the taps you posted. The “gone dark” is the only prop offsite i saw, and a very good sign that i indeed acquired a heavy dose of Favreitis. This post was tighter than anything i could have dreamed of writing poobers.
my frigging kingdom for one of them to listen to you.
daveawayfromhome Aug 22
Pooby, you’re way bigger than the God of Jerry Falwell and his ilk.
distributorcap Aug 23
great post
i just love how this piece of shit in the white house constantly goes back and forth on any issue or thought (none of which are his own) just to further his lame and failed agenda..
now it is vietnam — anyone old enough to remember those final days in Saigon April 1975 knows that Baghdad is not far behind
Flimsy Sanity Aug 23
It is my firm belief that man craves delusion especially if mixed with fear. When I was teaching, the favorite subjects for term papers were UFO’s and abduction, ghosts, witchcraft, Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, etc. and no one was interested in current politics or science topics or things of any relevence to their lives. Children give up Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, and Tooth Fairy pretty easy but they hang on to the ones that scare them a little. I never understood the attraction of horror movies but they do big box office, but I believe there is some form of inherent love of fear and religion preys (heh, heh) on it. Man has always had gods and devils because they love a mysterious explanation much more than a realistic one. If you are continually deluded, you are psychotic, but a little seems desirable.
Flimsy Sanity Aug 23
The best religious joke ever:
http://jasonclark.ws/2007/08/07/die-heretic/
Deb Aug 24
Flimsy,
Snicker, that was cute. But only because it has the ring of truth.