George Gets His Pee Pee Whacked

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Whaddaya know? It turns out the granddaddy of all the Emperor’s “completely” legal programs is unconstitutional after all. Who woulda thunk it?

The Supremes’ 5-3 ruling puts – albeit temporarily – the kibosh on military tribunals for Gitmo detainees. Why temporarily? Simple, the Emperor has a long history of disregarding laws based on personal whim and an even longer history of not leaning from his mistakes. A brighter man would assess the situation and say, “You know, I might have just gotten a little carried away there. Perhaps this Constitution thingee deserves a fresh look now that the courts have handed me my ass.”

Could you ever imagine Shrub thinking something like that? I didn’t think so.

No, George will piddle ever-onward, as determined as ever that God and Dick Cheney are on his side and have endowed him with the superhuman ability to see and know all. He’ll stroll on up Capitol Hill for a closed door session with the other raving right wing loons and emerge with freshly-minted legislation that says, “yup, he’s the Emperor, sure ’nuff.”

It doesn’t really matter if the new law is equally unconstitutional, because by the time it fights its way back to SCOTUS, he’ll be back on the ranch in Crawford basking in the reflected, but distorted, light of his glorious reign. Let’s put it this way, the GITMOsters can stop packing their Korans for a trip back to the madras. That trip will be postponed for many years to come. And, if I were them, I wouldn’t bank on the Jailer-in-Chief coming through with his heartfelt desire to shut Gitmo down either. Even if he does, they’ll only be bundled onto an unmarked airplane on it’s way to some other penal garden spot – perhaps Cheney’s “undisclosed location” for all I know – where they’ll still be detained and no one will know where they are. I can see the Smirking Chimp pantomiming locking his lips and thrwoing away the key as I write this.

Some view this latest ruling as an indictment of Brother Chickenhawk’s other self-proclaimed “legal” intelligence programs, but there’s a high probability they’ll be disappointed as well. It’s still a long way before the courts test the legality of warrantless wiretapping, banking surveillance, and God knows what else. Meantime, Lord Bush and his Cabal can, and will, continue to bleed the Constitution to death from a series of small cuts. By the time he’s done, the Constitution will be reduced to a single amendment in the Bill of Rights – “All hail Master Bush and all who glorify him.” We’ll be lucky to get out of this without the inscriptions on the face of quarters changing to “In Cowpoke We Trust”.

I really do wish I felt less cynical about this – but hey, I’m a Daily Show watcher and we all know what that means. The Skater-in-Chief has repeatedly shown his uncanny knack for seizing defeat from the jaws of victory and I suspect this time will be no different. Some of my weak-kneed and weak-minded countrymen have already begun creeping back to the fold – proving once again that people will do the dumbest things if you tell them flags should be fireproof.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not averse to seeing the idiot get his pee pee whacked, I’ve just seen him enjoy it a time too many.

So there you have it. Our liberties are falling like trees in the George W. Bush National Forest and we’re being led by a man who has concrete where his brain should be. When will people stop frittering away their precious Constitutional legacy based on advice from a smirking Alfred E. Neuman lookalike? When will they stop allowing the terrorists to win at the very game they always planned – destroying our way of life? When will Americans grow backbones to resist this sort of chicanery? Never, unless someone does something, so it might as well be me.

I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it any more!

Jellyfish of the world unite! Forward float!

10 thoughts on “George Gets His Pee Pee Whacked

  1. I don’t think I’ve that word “piddle” since I was a young lad. But it’s great word, and describes Bush to a ‘t’…or maybe a ‘p’.

  2. Oh great Poohbah, you are the emperor of sarcasm… I bow down to you (after I’ve finished laughing until I cried)…

    J

  3. Oooh! You did? Might make for a great “walk down memory lane post” *hint, hint* from the archives of the wonderful omnipotent one!

    I am impressed!

  4. Mary,
    Take your basking where you can get it. I like that!

    Michael,
    I never have trusted anyone who claims to be right all the time – myself included. What I don’t understnad is that for a bunch who make such a brouhaha over not trusting the government, they seem awfully open to trusting anything the leader of the government says without question.

    If you wanna swear undying allegiance, I won’t tell anyone. Besides, I’ve never had a fan club.

    Dusty,
    You’ve been watching too much Jon Stewart obviously. Watch a little Bill O, that’ll set ya on the right track, or maybe kill you, I always get that confused.

    Kona,
    Unfortuately, there’s that whole Bush Legacy thing. He might back to the ranch, but Jeb, Neil and the twins haven’t taken a shot at the Oval yet.

    Dang, that’s just way to depressing to think about.

    Miz B,
    You may be weeping, but at least you can get good tapas. BTW, you can impress all your friends and tell them I got to meet Juan Carlos and Sophie once.

    Sumo,
    Jellyfish are perfect. Float like a jellyfish, sting like a, um jellyfish. Not as poetic as float like a butterfly and sting like a bee, but you get some stinging in either way. You can’t lose.

  5. I never really thought of myself as a jellyfish…but I do love the water…so I’ll float with you…sink or swim I am with you OP. Besides the title of the post had me hooked and reeled in real quick! Oh…how I love political porn!

  6. Would you have guessed that I am a Jon Stewart fan? And back from his MTV days too… in fact, I actually have a video of him talking to me as I film him at some Rock n’ Jock party back in the day… but I digress… because the view of what is happening back in the US is just plain sad. Yes, am loving this victory but the war against the jackass is far from won and mention the rape of the Constitution and I weep. I WEEP!

  7. I’m counting the months until the “cowpoke” returns to Crawford. I shudder to think what else awaits us between now and then.

  8. I sang the praises of the five Supreme’s when this ruling was handed down the other day..but then I woke up and realized that the Shrub and his congress will just find a way around it..making some disgusting law that will allow him to continue doing the unthinkable and unconsciounable as he sees fit. I think I am becoming far too jaded and disillusioned.

  9. Some of my weak-kneed and weak-minded countrymen have already begun creeping back to the fold – proving once again that people will do the dumbest things if you tell them flags should be fireproof.

    I know I come off as a Radical Leftist to Wingnuts, and can appear almost Hillarian in my centrism to some of my Lefty compadres, and I KNOW that it’s because of facts like the above. The latter is truly because I really do think that inclusion and tolerance have got to always be among the formost goals in order for Democracy to be both effective and societally efficacious.

    The “tolerance” issue becomes almost intolerably difficult when folk like Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld are all too intent on pushing their egomaniacal agenda no matter what the consequences to the “lesser folk” of the world. No polls nor reason nor facts of History will dissuade them from thinking they’re right to go to any lengths to make the rest of the world live how THEY decide is right and necessary, and they’ll believe they’re right to their dying days.

    If the FSM didn’t have his Noodly Appendage so firmly integrated with my root Chakra, I swear I’d swear undying allegiance to ya Poobah!

  10. I’m still going to enjoy the moment when Bush was thrown an anchor by the Supremes. It might not last, but I’m going to bask for just a bit.

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